


He Thought

by kanoitrace



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, M/M, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-27
Updated: 2014-11-27
Packaged: 2018-02-27 04:29:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2679158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kanoitrace/pseuds/kanoitrace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean had once thought he loved him- once thought he'd been in love with Cas.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Thought

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not really sure where this came from...

Dean had once thought he loved him- once thought he'd been in love with Cas. He'd been ready to stake his name on it. Forget the killing things, the saving people, forget the whole family business. He'd known once they got out of Purgatory he was going to lay it all down, lay himself at an angel's feet, and pledge his unending devotion. Maybe he wouldn't do it in such a corny way as all that, after all, he was still Dean Winchester. He had an image to uphold. But he knew that once they left, because they  _were_  leaving, Dean was tossing aside the life he'd always known to be with Castiel. He was tired of them both hurting. He was ready to be happy.

Dean had once thought he'd loved Cas, only Castiel threw a wrench in it. Castiel couldn't let the lifestyle go. Fuck brainwashing and Naomi and every other lame ass excuse. It started when Castiel had refused to come with him. Castiel would always refuse to come with him. And it made sense. What could  _he_  offer an angel? He wasn't the Righteous Man anymore. That title was long gone with the apocalypse. Never mind the fact that Dean had left Castiel how many times now? Been cruel and rude and demanding and unfair how often? It was a painful eye opener, but one he needed.

Dean had once thought he'd been in love with Cas, but that would require knowing what love is. Dean had to face the fact he didn't know the first thing about love, and he could never expect Cas to understand. After all, an angel needed a teacher in the ways of humanity. Dean was a poor one.

He once thought he'd loved an angel, but then life got in the way. Fight after fight, obstacle after obstacle. Love was never supposed to be easy, but it could never thrive when it was this hard. They grew apart, slowly but surely, becoming different people on different ends of the board, until they weren't even in the same game. But if sometimes Dean pondered still what it was like to love an angel, nobody had to know.


End file.
